Friday, November 6, 2009

The divorce stick

Okay, people say that they get the short end of the stick, or the bad end of the stick in a bad situation right?
Well I was just thinking about it, because in some situations you might THINK you've got the bad end, but in reality both ends of the stick are just as bad as each other. So your tough out of luck there aren't you.
I know, I know.
"pessimism is bad! the glass is half full - not empty! There's always a silver lining! blah blah blah blah"
But honestly, sometimes that silver lining takes friggen ages to show up. I mean, that lining is waaaay beyond 'fashionably late'. Sometimes it just skips the party all together, has something better to do than spend its time hanging around the depressing stuff. Cause its not like its getting paid to hang around miserable people all day and night is it?
No. No, sometimes it hates its job just as much as the rest of us and decides to pull a sicky from work and stay home.

Thats what its like for me right now. I have the bad end of the stick. My silver linings on holiday, tanning on the coast of some tropical island, drinking lemon lime and bitters while hitting on gold linings and bronze linings all day. Im ditched. You'd think there would be a 'Silver Lining Replacement' program for when the original ones are busy.

Well, Im stressed from exams and shizz, which is pretty annoying. Along with the fact that my birthdays coming up - which is what brings me to what I actually came on here to have a little rant and complain about.. And thats what its like being the daughter of divorced parents.
I noticed earlier that I hadn't written about this at all since I started blogging - even though, admittedly, I only started blogging like 3 months ago.
But it's part of my everyday life, so it's strange i never mentioned it.
Now, before any recently divorced parents totally freak out about their kids emotional well being, I'd like to say it doesn't completely destroy our lives.
Yes... it DOES suck in almost all situations that it happens... But we get over it if we have support from friends and family. Me for example; My parents announced their split up like just over 2 years ago or something. I was hit pretty hard, as was to be expected. It sucked. Also as was to be expected.
But yeah, we get over it sooner or later. Give it a while and we'll be almost back to normal - kids bounce back easier than adults (not literally. Like, if you push one over over it wont just bounce back like a ball).
Anyway, I'm not here to complain about that part, because I know that its horrible for the parents even more so than us kids.
Im going to complain about how it is with things like custody arrangements.
I can honestly say that they annoy me almost as much as when someone puts a milk bottle back in the fridge when its empty (its like COME ON. Where is the sense in that?!)
My parents decided that its one week each: 7th mums - 14th dads -21st mums - 28th dads - 5th mums - 12th dads etc
SO this basically means that for the past two and a bit years I've been living out of a suitcase because I CBF unpacking and packing EVERY - SINGLE - MONDAY!!

There is always awkward moments like when dads side grandparents invites you for dinner - when its mums week to own me. Because what do you say? "Sorry, I'm not part of your family this week" ?

Also, its frustrating when I have to be transferred between houses because the parents will refuse to talk to each other, and if they DO talk then its awkward cause the only topic of conversation on the menu is us kids and our grades at school. I've briefly considered writing cue cards with conversation starters. I could give them harmless subjects - like the weather, politics, gardening, ingredients to various recipes, Britney spears' most recent gossip... You know. Just meaningless crap.

My social life has been dramatically changed because all my friends refuse to call my home phone since nobody can figure out which house I'm at. And if they do ask me to go out, chances are I can't go because I'll be either in the middle of nowhere at mums lifestyle block or I'll be at dads place and he'll say NO.

Then there's the things which put pressure on us kiddy winkles. The decisions that we have to make are ridiculous.
Because in celebrations like christmas and birthdays.. we have to CHOOSE a parent to spend it with. Thats why Im writing about it now. My birthdays in a fews days time and I've decided that I'm not going to have a birthday party - Even though I have every other year of my life - Even though I'm turning 17 - because I dont think eeny meenie miny mo would work in this situation. I know that neither of my parents want to give me one, and I don't want to make one of them do it while the other one gets to sit back and laugh at the others miss-fortune.
So I've decided to skip it. Im going to go to the beach with my friends for a few hours. No parents invited. THEY CAN GET STUFFED.

So as I was talking about the "bad end of the stick" before. Divorce, doesn't have one bad end. Or even TWO bad ends. The whole thing is a bad end. You have a stick representing divorece, one parent on each side - then you have the kids joining them together in the middle, and all of these positions are bad..
And people have the nerve to tell us to hug trees?
Well I say NO. Trees should be hugging US because if they didn't grow sticks in the first place none of this would have happened!

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