SMACK

This afternoon, I found myself standing in the shower gingerly touching my head (no pun intended), wincing, and wondering "Why me?"

When I was falling asleep last night, thinking the same question, the bruise wasn't quite as much of a lump. A painful lump, yes, but not a mountainous lump. But while I was innocently sleeping, it probably doubled in size and changed a few shades darker purple - I wouldn't know. Im growing hair over it.

I also thought that same question several moments after I gained my monumental bruise.
I was in the bathroom, looking for my toothbrush (turns out it wasn't there anyway, so I suffered for nothing). I knocked something from the shelf under the sink, so I naturally picked it up.
It was the 'up' part that I regret.
My process of standing up was... interrupted... By the bathroom sink....
I wish I hadn't felt the need to stand up so fast, because I hit my head so badly that it took about 5 seconds for me to get over the teeth chattering, vision blurring shock of "what the hell just happened?" to fully register just how much it hurt.
Until I realised the pain, I was wondering how on Earth my mum didn't wake up from such a thump.
As it throbbed and got hot, I thought about what I might have done to deserve it.

I remember when I was little, if I hit my head on something, or jammed my hand in the door, my nana would tell me "you tell that door to behave! You tell it that its a BAD door"
So I would, Id say "bad door!!" Then I'd hit it. And it would hurt.
Problem not solved.